Christian Men, Support Your Trans Sisters
Mark 10:42-44
So Jesus called them and said to them, “You know that among the gentiles those whom they recognize as their rulers lord it over them, and their great ones are tyrants over them. But it is not so among you; instead, whoever wishes to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wishes to be first among you must be slave of all.
This passage in Mark's gospel comes from an episode where two of Jesus's disciples, James and John, ask him for positions of power that they expect will be available in his kingdom. In Jesus's new hierarchy, they imagine, there will be people with authority to decide what's right and wrong, who will get what they want when they want it, and whose greatness is defined by the amount of control they have over and above others. In response, Jesus, as he often does, entirely inverts their expectations and highlights the diametric opposition between the gentiles' understanding (that is, the earthly, human way of thinking) and God's approach, whose "ways are higher than" our ways (Isaiah 55:9). He teaches that in contrast to those ambitious for power over other people, "it is not so among you." Christians are to be characterized by great service and first-rank humility. The type of power that Jesus describes does not seek to dominate people from above, but to lift them up from below.
In our current world, we as men often deal with power imbalances in our favor. We are, on the whole, more likely to have greater physical power, economic power, or social power across a range of situations, whether due to the circumstances of our birth, the roles we've taken on in our lives, the unjust biases in society that prioritize men's interests, or a combination of all these factors and more. There is of course no universal narrative that applies to every single man without exception, but speaking at a general level, we cannot simply pretend that power does not exist for us or is irrelevant to us. Every man has been dealt a different hand, but all of us must accept responsibility for our choices in whatever context we find ourselves in, and work to advance God's kingdom of mercy, equality, and justice in whatever form is appropriate to our individual lives.
Now, consider the transgender women in our communities. They are publicly derided by state and federal government leaders as dishonest, untrustworthy, and incapable. Their doctors withhold needed medical procedures. At their workplaces they face threats and discrimination, especially if they work with children, but on average are paid less than any other minority group. When was the last time you were afraid that your driver's license would be revoked through no fault of your own? When was the last time you feared for your safety in a public restroom? When was the last time your state governor mocked you for wanting to play sports? For many of us, such worries are not even in the realm of possibility, but these are direct concerns for transgender women today. Is this state of affairs coherent with an attitude of Christ-like service? To me, such harassment and injustice seems to come from the mindset of James and John who want others to conform to their will and want to use God's authority to justify it.
These problems often directly affect transgender men as well, and should not be overlooked in that context. For this post I'm focusing on trans women as particularly targeted in today's culture through the lenses of both transphobia and misogyny, in order to emphasize our responsibility specifically as men in the resulting power imbalance. In simpler terms, my point is that we men (including trans men) are called to support, enable, and empower women at all times, and that calling is all the clearer towards those particular women who are at a greater disadvantage, in this case trans women. In any case, much of this post can apply to our attitude towards all transgender people and ultimately towards all marginalized people, widows, orphans, foreigners, imprisoned, sick, and hungry, for whom Jesus Christ stands as mediator and liberator.
At this point you might be agreeing with the principles of what I've said, even if not all the specifics, because your viewpoint is along these lines: “I am Christ-like and supportive, but being trans is unhealthy, so rejecting it in others is a type of support.” This is a rationalization that I have encountered many times, so it's time to confront it with truth. Attacking someone's gender identity is never supportive. It is not compatible with Jesus's steadfast and transformative love, neither physically, nor mentally, nor spiritually, no matter how you slice it. Let me explain why.
If you can read this article, you’re already capable of finding the data that indicate the positive outcomes for gender transition, so I won't repeat them here. However, at a more fundamental level, I don't want to frame this conversation in terms of analyzing studies and critiquing methodologies, at least not right now. Raw statistics presented in isolation aren't always the open-and-shut proof so often desired, especially if they can be biased, misleading, contradictory, or at the very least hard to interpret. Let me therefore suggest a different approach: speak with the trans people in your life and listen to how their lives have changed, then decide whether gender transition is unhealthy. You can find a lifetime's worth of opinions about trans people from podcasters, politicians, and pastors who are not trans, but if you want accurate information about someone's life, then you need to go to the source. I suspect that when you do this, the vast majority of negative experiences you’ll hear will be about family withholding support, friends turning away, and politicians and business leaders making day-to-day life harder. Take in this information and evaluate where, and who, the problems are coming from. Observe for yourself the pain, the relief, the causes, and the effects, and you will soon recognize whose actions reflect the restorative healing of the Great Physician and whose do not.
Do you not know any trans people you can listen to? In that case I would posit you lack sufficient information to decide for them what is healthy or not. You ought to remediate this by making an effort to reach out before presuming to form a conviction. It may require going somewhere you haven’t been before, allowing others to assist you in areas of uncertainty, and admitting mistaken understanding when someone provides new information. It may not fit nicely into your weekly routine. Yet these are hardly insurmountable obstacles for a man possessed of inner strength and Christ-like humility. You incur no great injury from a few hours of initial awkwardness. You are not so weak as to fear going out of your comfort zone. In fact I'd point out that insisting on having everything one’s own way is childish behavior, like a picky eater refusing a new food. Instead of retreating to such a mindset, fortify yourself by doing the work to connect with others and digest new perspectives.
Do you point to cases where gender transition was regretted or reversed, such as those of people who have detransitioned, as justification for complete prohibition? Men, we must reason with greater clarity than this. If a single employee was a bad fit at your workplace, does that mean no one should work there at all? If one person has a bad experience at your church, does that mean the government should eradicate your faith? If someone has a painful divorce, should your marriage license be revoked? No, in any of these situations, you would rightly feel that your personal freedom and flourishing were being unjustly denied. Yet this is the daily reality of our trans sisters who experience hostility simply because of their personal choices. Why are you so slow to affirm and support your neighbor, but so quick to raise objections and counter-examples? The reactive urge to over-generalize comes from a desire to be in control of other people, to say "Aha, here's the proof that my way is best." We are not called to be tyrants. We recognize the truth that for some people, transitioning wasn't the right decision, but we understand that people deserve to have agency over their lives even if it involves making tradeoffs, changing courses, and managing consequences. Scripture everywhere exhorts us to do right by those in need, and the divine Judge does not accept flimsy stereotyping as a substitute for justice. If you claim to stand for the eternal truth, but your mind is persuaded by every extremist anecdote that comes across your social media feed, then you do not really stand for anything. Principled thinking recognizes nuances, accounts for multiple factors, and lives into our God-given rationality as images of the Word.
Men, it’s time for us to stop making lazy excuses for controlling other people and lording our power over them, and time for our acts of service to be the measure of our greatness. Examine your beliefs with honesty and ask yourself if your behavior towards transgender women reflects Jesus who "came not to be served but to serve," or James and John who said "we want you to do for us whatever we ask." For Christ is the one who was raised, by whose blood we approach the throne of grace, who works vindication and justice for all who are oppressed, and to whom be glory forever and ever.